Today is my birthday. 33 years old and not even a hint of grumpiness! I have enjoyed the day without making a big deal of it. Some lovely friends have bought me lovely gifts and have shared in a lovely evening of great wine and laughter. Perfect, what could be better?
My amazing friend Hannah left these beautiful flowers on my doorstep. It was such a boost when I got home tonight, it made me really happy.
It has taken me a long time to get to such a happy perspective on my birthday. Only a couple of years ago I would have been tearful on the lead up to it. I couldn’t explain why, or justify my irrational emotional state, but as the 21st July drew nearer something was just not right. Looking back I think it was a self consumed state of mind that led me to feel that no one cared enough, that no one was bothering enough. That sort of thinking got me no where. Being grumpy only pushes people away or makes them worry about you rather than just enjoying your company.
Mindfulness has changed everything. I hate to admit it but I think the big change in my point of view has been becoming less selfish. Rather than expecting others to make my birthday special I have come round to the idea that I should just chill out. As we get older we realise that our birthdays are just another day. The lovely things that people do such as bringing us flowers or sending us a card should be a real bonus and should not be expected.
Just this change in perspective makes all the difference to how I view the events during my day. I have been so grateful for all of the Facebook and Twitter messages that my friends have sent. I have been truly touched by all of the friends who have gone to the amazing effort of buying a card and posting it. I have fully appreciated those who have purchased, wrapped and come round with gifts, no matter what they are. The effort involved is everything.
Looking at others and the efforts they make and the appreciation they deserve is an amazing perspective. Gratitude feels good. So much better than being self absorbed. No one wants to admit to moments of selfishness but most of us have them. Next time you find that you are feeling sorry for yourself take a few deep breaths and try to think from another perspective. Think about another person, how you could make the situation better for them, what you could do to make a another person happier. You will be amazed how these small thoughts can make a huge difference to how you view your own situation.
Come on a Revitalise Day to see how life can become lighter, just by taking a different perspective. A day retreat is all about you, but it will leave you ready to think about others and to appreciate fully the things that others do for you.